I admit it. I'm 39 and the other week I had my first case of Monday blues. I was over it. Everything. I found myself looking at everyone I encountered who seemed to have a normal 9-5 and wondered if I could work in an office or do what my brain tells me is a mundane job. I was miserable for a considerable amount of that day and I can't figure out how someone could live their whole life like that! I could't live waiting for Friday and dreading Mondays!
My problem is that I love my job. Well, actually, I love my career. I loved my job in Pre-k (some 8.5 years ago). The problem is the pay. And I can't even lie. I (we) have it a LOT better than some teachers in other states. My heart goes out to them because I don't know what I would do in their situation. Actually, I left the country for pay so I guess I DO know what I would do. To be more specific- I was willing to pack up, sell my things, HELL, give away my DOG, to have a better life. It shouldn't be this way.
Luckily, I shook it off and got back to my normal life. If I am not willing to change careers over all the BS, I shouldn't give it more than a day of my time. Even an entire day is too much. This week I got to hear lovely thoughts from KG and Pre-K kids. Things like, "OOOH MY BUTT ITCH!", "Mrs X, are you a boy or a girl?", and someone who felt like licking the bottom of their toe was going to make it feel better. There is no greater feeling than to have a kid jump up from a lesson to give you a tight hug around your neck because they loved the brain break that much or that troubled child who you struggle to make a relationship with and even though it is still a battle, they walk up and give you random hugs throughout the day.Even typing it has me feeling like I must have a hair in my eye because I'm not crying about no kids on a nice saturday afternoon on the patio!
So even if I never win the lottery because I just mostly think about it when I pass the billboard EVERY morning on the way to work and daydream about how different life would be if I won. I don't actually play but I am winning every day that I walk into that raggedy ass building and greet each child by their name with a smile and really mean it. We laugh, talk, and learn. And while it may not seem as good as winning the lottery, it is as close to winning the lottery as I may ever get and I can live with that.
My problem is that I love my job. Well, actually, I love my career. I loved my job in Pre-k (some 8.5 years ago). The problem is the pay. And I can't even lie. I (we) have it a LOT better than some teachers in other states. My heart goes out to them because I don't know what I would do in their situation. Actually, I left the country for pay so I guess I DO know what I would do. To be more specific- I was willing to pack up, sell my things, HELL, give away my DOG, to have a better life. It shouldn't be this way.
Luckily, I shook it off and got back to my normal life. If I am not willing to change careers over all the BS, I shouldn't give it more than a day of my time. Even an entire day is too much. This week I got to hear lovely thoughts from KG and Pre-K kids. Things like, "OOOH MY BUTT ITCH!", "Mrs X, are you a boy or a girl?", and someone who felt like licking the bottom of their toe was going to make it feel better. There is no greater feeling than to have a kid jump up from a lesson to give you a tight hug around your neck because they loved the brain break that much or that troubled child who you struggle to make a relationship with and even though it is still a battle, they walk up and give you random hugs throughout the day.Even typing it has me feeling like I must have a hair in my eye because I'm not crying about no kids on a nice saturday afternoon on the patio!
So even if I never win the lottery because I just mostly think about it when I pass the billboard EVERY morning on the way to work and daydream about how different life would be if I won. I don't actually play but I am winning every day that I walk into that raggedy ass building and greet each child by their name with a smile and really mean it. We laugh, talk, and learn. And while it may not seem as good as winning the lottery, it is as close to winning the lottery as I may ever get and I can live with that.
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